


working brilliantly 99% of the time

by ruthvsreality



Category: Crooked Media RPF
Genre: Misunderstandings, Multi, Threesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-07-08 23:29:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19877866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruthvsreality/pseuds/ruthvsreality
Summary: Howli and Dan try to seduce Alyssa. It doesn't work. Hijinks ensue.





	1. The Plan

**Author's Note:**

> As always, be nice and keep it secret.

It starts on a Sunday, as all good things in Howli’s life do. She meets up with Alyssa for lunch, and basks in the midafternoon sun as they sip their blueberry lemonades. There’s plenty of gossip to share.  
  
“I can’t believe them. You would’ve thought that he’d have proven himself at the White House, but no! The folks at GoFundMe really want him to run everything by them? Like he’s a little boy.”  
  
“Hardly a little boy.” Alyssa points out.  
  
“Exactly. But they don’t like his… quirks.” 

Alyssa tilts her head. “Quirks?”  
  
“Oh, you know. Needing everything to be done exactly on time, no pencil, only pen, his superstitions, weird stuff like that. Stuff we put up with, but maybe that’s just because we’re in love with him. But the guys over there, they don’t see anything but his quirks. You know?”  
  
Alyssa nods, but she has a funny look on her face. Howli trails off. 

“Honey?” 

“Nothing.” Alyssa forces a smile. “I guess we are kind of in love with him, huh.”  
  
“Yep.” Howli smiles proudly and winks. “And he better not ever forget it.” She raises her glass to clink with Alyssa’s.  
  
She does so, but her demeanor has changed. Even as they continue their conversation, it’s clear that Howli has said something wrong. But when she asks Alyssa if everything’s okay, Alyssa just nods enthusiastically and says she’s great.  
  
It only occurs to Howli on the ride home that it was that little remark about Dan where things went sideways.  
  
_I guess we are kind of in love with him, huh._

She nearly crashes her car into the Target parking lot when she realizes. 

Oh, God, Alyssa was serious!  
  
Howli has never thought about it before. But it makes sense. Alyssa has always been there, smiling, sweet, right next to Dan when he needs her to be there. They share the same brain sometimes, and when Howli invites Alyssa over to watch tv and chill, Alyssa is always in the middle, curled up between them, her head on Dan’s shoulder.  
  
Oh, Alyssa’s in love with Dan! Alyssa loves Dan, she knows that. Is it possible she's also _in love_ with Dan?  
  
Howli pulls up in the driveway of the house and sits there, letting the thought process in her mind.  
  
She keeps waiting for the jealousy and anger and betrayal to bubble up inside her. None of it comes. It’s like waiting for a pot to boil, except… the stove isn’t even on. She doesn’t feel the slightest twinge of anger.  
  
Alyssa’s her best friend. Maybe they’re not… Jon Favreau and Tommy Vietor close, but they’re close. They’re the perfect amount of close for Howli. And Howli has always liked Alyssa. Maybe a little too much, lately. Because it’s difficult not to be at least a little attracted to her, when Alyssa’s so pretty and smart and makes her laugh so much. 

Maybe she should feel jealous about Alyssa loving Dan. But… she doesn’t. She doesn’t know what she feels about it. 

It itches at her, even as she goes home and greets her husband and watches Russian Doll with him. Why is it bothering her? If it doesn’t make her jealous, what is it that she’s feeling?

It burns Howli up inside. She lies in bed next to Dan thinking about it. It finally comes to her at some ungodly hour.  
  
She doesn’t feel jealous. She feels… frustrated. Like there’s been some sort of injustice.

Alyssa must have thought she was being discreet. But why does she have to be? Why does she have to stifle how she feels?

Why does Alyssa need to hide that? She loves Dan. Howli loves Dan. No, Alyssa isn’t married to Dan, but... but... oh, fuck the specifics, the point is that Alyssa should never ever feel shame about who she loves! Dan is very loveable, and so is Alyssa.

She knows that it’s Dan. And Dan is married. To her. But… that doesn’t feel like as much of an obstacle as it should. Howli has always known she could love more than one person. Maybe Dan’s the same way; she’s never thought to ask him.

Maybe she can talk to Dan about this. But not now. Now it’s way too late at night. She’ll talk to him later. 

What would she even say, anyway? _Hey, your best friend is in love with you and I’m kind of okay with it?_ What would she even be advocating for? For Dan to date Alyssa? Would Dan even like that? Does Dan even feel a similar way about Alyssa? 

So many questions. Howli falls asleep dreaming of Alyssa in her big glasses, and her cute curly hair. 

The next few days, unfortunately, are hectic as hell. Howli gets about a million and one things to do at work, and on top of that Trump is erupting with his usual nonsense, so Dan is working on the pod practically 24/7. As much as she stressed about it on Sunday night, Howli has to push any potential relationship drama out of her mind and focus on her work.  
  
Next Sunday rolls around. Alyssa texts Howli and Dan and asks if they all want to get together to watch Law and Order like they did a couple of weeks ago. Both Howli and Dan wholeheartedly say yes, because that’s a fantastic idea.  
  
As much as she enjoys it, Howli does stop thinking about the potential of Dan and Alyssa when Alyssa is there, because… Alyssa brings a sense of peace with her. Maybe it’s the hippie thing, but Howli can’t be anxious when she’s around. She just carries a sense that everything is going to be alright. 

The night is wonderful; it feels a little like the sleepovers that Howli used to have when she was in high school. They bounce around from activity to activity; they sit on the couch and watch Law and Order, and then they get bored and make a fruit salad and eat it outside, and then they get bored of being outside and go back indoors and listen to a podcast. 

At some point Dan has to take a call; when he hangs up his phone automatically starts playing music over the speaker system. It’s one of the songs Howli put on his phone, on the “Howli Playlist”. 

_Mirror, mirror on the wall/Don't say it ’cause I know I'm cute (Ooh, baby)/Louis down to my drawers/LV all on my shoes (Ooh, baby)_

Alyssa grins and turns to Howli. “Wanna dance?”  
  
“Sure.” They both get up and move behind the couch so they can dance without knocking their knees into the coffee table. “Dan! Come back, we’re having a dance party!”  
  
Dan walks back in and leans against the doorway, watching them jump around with abandon. “I’ll be the deejay, if that’s okay.”  
  
Alyssa sticks her tongue out at him and Howli rolls her eyes. “He’s just embarrassed because he can’t dance.”  
  
“We’ll dance for him.”  
  
It’s fun, to hang with Alyssa like this. To do silly things, to let loose a little, even though she knows all three of them can be serious. 

_It ain’t my fault that I'm out here gettin’ loose/Gotta blame it on the Goose/Gotta blame it on my juice, baby..._

Alyssa takes Howli’s hands and rocks them back and forth to the beat. “Howl, I hope you know that this is what we’re going to do every time Tr-” 

“Oh, God, do _not_ bring him up!” Dan protests. He’s starting to sway to the beat, too.  
  
“Every time _someone_ brings us down. Because I don’t think I could ever be sad dancing with you.”  
  
Howli feels like her face is going to hurt from smiling. “I feel that way, too.”  
  
They continue dancing for a bit.  
  
There’s a moment, here, in their living room, where Howli swears there’s magic present. Everything is dipped gold by the sunshine; Alyssa’s hands are soft from the fancy lotion that she gets from that one store downtown. Dan has those crinkles around his eyes that signal he’s really happy. It’s like they’ve put up a little barrier around themselves, holding in good vibes like fireflies in a jar.  
  
The song fades and goes silent; a slower song starts.  
  
Alyssa’s face is flushed; her eyes are bright. “Howli,” she says breathlessly, “you’re really beautiful, you know that?”  
  
Howli beams. “You’re gorgeous, ‘Lyssa,” she murmurs. 

The moment ends. Dan’s phone rings again; someone really wants to talk to him. Howli and Alyssa are still staring at each other.  
  
Howli’s been getting it wrong. It’s never just been Dan. Alyssa has never had eyes for him.  
  
She’s had eyes for _them.  
_

It’s another one of these things Howli just knows, like how she knows that there’s a floor beneath her feet and a roof over her head.  
  
“I should - I should go,” Alyssa gulps. She suddenly looks a little nervous. “I have to feed the cats.”  
  
“You sure?” Dan says. “You’re not far - we could, I don’t know, go and come back.”  
  
“No, it’s - it’s okay.” Alyssa swallows. “I have some work I’ve been putting off, anyway.”  
  
Howli nods. “Well, it was - it was so good having you.”  
  
Alyssa smiles. “It was so good to be here. Again, soon?”  
  
“Absolutely.” Dan says. 

She’s gone so quickly that it leaves Howli with mood whiplash. For a second she wonders if she imagined what happened.  
  
But then Dan says, “You two are so cute together,” and Howli knows it was real. 

She doesn’t know the specifics. But Alyssa loves them. And Howli is one hundred percent in favor of that. She wants that love. She wants Alyssa.  
  
She has to tell Dan. 

Howli means to tell him right there and then, but then his phone rings again, and it has to wait until later that night. 

Howli considers putting it off for another night, but after a few hours in bed thinking about it, she realizes she won’t be able to sleep without telling him first. 

She pokes Dan awake and frowns at him. “Did you know Alyssa’s in love with you?” 

Dan blinks. “Wazza?” 

“Alyssa. She loves you.” 

“I - what?.” Dan turns to look at the alarm clock. “Oh my god, why are we awake?” 

“I mean she _loves_ you, Dan.”  
  
“I know that. Why are you…?” Dan shakes his head like a sleepy bear. Howli glares at him; does she have to spell everything out?

“I mean she _wants_ you. That’s how she loves you.” Howli pauses. “But Dan, I think you’ve broken her heart!” 

Dan frowns. “What?” 

“Alyssa. She loves you, and - and maybe she loves me - and she just has it bottled up inside her.” 

Dan raises an eyebrow. “And she’s told you all this?” 

Howli swallows. “No. But it’s true! I just - I know it.” 

Dan still looks skeptical. “Honey, can we discuss this in the morning?” 

She considers the time. This isn’t a life or death situation, but at least now she's introduced the topic with Dan. “I guess.” 

Dan flops back onto the pillow and is snoring within minutes. Eventually Howli falls asleep too, but not without thinking some more. Something must be done, here. This is important. 

There was magic in that room, when the three of them were dancing around. Howli wants to feel it again. 

\--- 

Dan had been looking forward to tomorrow morning. Wake up early, shower with his wife, maybe sneak in some oral sex, stop at Starbucks (or Dunkin, he’s not picky), and get to work to do the pod with Jon. 

Some of that does happen, but his wife is very stressed out. 

“She loves us, Dan! You didn’t see her like I saw her. And you don’t know her like I know her. You were her boss for too long.” 

“I guess.” Dan runs a towel over his damp hair and admires how his wife is able to do that towel turban thing. “Well what do you plan on doing about it? From what it sounds like, she sounds pretty spooked. And I mean, I’m okay with anything you’re okay with, but -“ 

“Simple!” Howli steps out of the bathroom to get dressed. “We have to woo her.” 

Dan sighs. _Here we go again_. 

Howli always has a plan. 99% of them work, and brilliantly, too. But the 1%... 

He follows her back out to the bedroom. “How will we _woo_ her?”

“We’ll invite her to dinner,” Howli tugs on underwear and a bra ( _bye bye beautiful tits :(_ , Dan thinks), “And we seduce her.” 

“As one does.” Dan can’t remember the last time he seduced anybody, if he ever did. Did he seduce Howli? He did cook her dinner that one time. But she didn’t really beg him to ravish her as much as fall asleep while watching the Sixers game with him. (Not that Dan would ever complain about that date; it was a good date.)

“But classy, Dan! We’ll be cool about it. It’ll just be like normal, except we’ll ask her to come to bed with us at the end.” 

“Oh, yeah, super normal. Didn’t we ask Jon that last week?” Dan says sarcastically. 

Howli glares at him. “Dan, you’ve already broken her heart. Don’t piss me off.”

Dan holds his hands up. When did this heartbreak even take place? He didn’t think he’d wake up this morning as a heartbreaker. “I’m happy to assist in the seduction. I love Alyssa, I’d be happy to date her.” He blinks. “God, that sounds weird saying it to you.” 

“No, it feels right.” Howli smiles. “Doesn’t it?” 

Dan considers this. “It does.” 

They go to work with smiles on their faces. 

Howli invites Alyssa over by text in the group chat. Alyssa happily says yes. Dan knows it’s happy because he counted the emojis and there are more than usual.

Part of him is still having trouble believing this is happening. Of course, it’s not as if he’s been secretly pining for Alyssa all this time; he loves Howli, and he’d happily spend the rest of his life with her and only with her. But he had a big crush on Alyssa for a long time, loved working with her so closely, loved how well she seemed to understand him, and that never really went away, in an abstract sense. Hearing that Howli felt similarly was… a dream come true, to be honest.  
  
But he’s still pretty skeptical that their feelings are requited. He knows he and Howli are different, because they can love more than one person at once. It’s not just something everyone’s into. For one, he’s only ever known Alyssa to be attracted to men. That’s kind of a big barrier to their master plan.  
  
And if Alyssa really _does_ want them, wouldn’t she have said something? At least to Dan? Wouldn’t she have mentioned it during their time in the White House? Or once they had left the White House?  
  
Dan tries to imagine what that conversation would look like. He wasn’t exactly the most… aware person, back then. He focused mostly on his work, sometimes at the expense of his own health and the feelings of the people around him.  
  
Shit, what if he _did_ break her heart?  
  
Well, this will be a chance to make it right. If there’s anything to make right in the first place.  
  
(He hopes there’s something there. Blame Howli for getting his hopes up, but she’s just so damn cute when she’s excited.)

\---

When the night rolls around, Howli and Dan dress casual, but nice. Howli makes an old family recipe that’s sure to be a hit, and cinnamon rolls for dessert. 

The dinner goes wonderfully. Alyssa laughs at all their jokes, and they all spend the evening making heart eyes at each other, as it should be. 

There’s a moment when Dan passes a dish, and Alyssa takes it, and their fingers touch. 

There’s another moment when Alyssa reaches out and touches the fabric of Howli’s speckled blue sundress, and compliments her fashion sense.

But the best isn’t really a “moment” at all; it’s just watching Dan and Alyssa go back and forth, trading jokes about Mueller and Trump and the world around them. Dan shows them something on his phone, a video or something, and Alyssa’s hand covers his as they watch. 

Alyssa and Howli’s husband are so cute together. Maybe in another world Howli would be jealous. But she’s not. She just wants to see more. 

Eventually, Alyssa looks at the clock. (Howli is going to throw that stupid thing away.) “I should be going.” 

“Are you sure? I mean...” _How to do this subtly..._ “we have a big bed.” 

Dan nearly spits out his wine. Okay, maybe not so subtle. 

But Alyssa doesn’t seem to notice. “No, it’s okay. I’ve got to get to the office early tomorrow anyway.” She smiles. 

Howli nods, and walks her to the door. Was - was the date good, at least? She thinks she made it clear in the text. She even said, _it’s a date._

Alyssa stares into her eyes for a moment. “I had a really lovely time, Howli.” 

“We always have a lovely time with you, Alyssa.” Howli replies. 

They hug. Alyssa is bite sized and perfect. Howli gives her a little squeeze, then seeks out her cheek.

Howli leans in for a kiss - 

And Alyssa turns away. 

“I’ll text you when I get home, okay?” 

Howli nods, her heart shattered. “Okay.” She smiles and waves at her as she goes. 

When she turns back to Dan, he looks pitying, like he knows what happened. 

“She didn’t - but I thought it went well. She even held your hand.” Howli feels the corners of her mouth turn down. Don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry... 

“Honey, do you think... maybe this had less to do with Alyssa’s feelings for us, and more to do with our feelings for Alyssa?” 

Howli bursts into big fat ugly tears. She allows herself to be held by Dan and grabs a second cinnamon roll. 


	2. The Van

It’s been a month since they were rejected, and Dan thinks he and Howli are taking it pretty well. 

For whatever reason, Alyssa doesn’t seem to want to acknowledge it. This is fine; Dan doesn’t want to acknowledge it either. In retrospect, the idea that they could just casually, on the fly, seduce their best friend is laughable at best, and slightly humiliating at worst. He has no desire to relive it.    
  
Besides, why wallow in the past when good things are happening all around them? Pod Save America is on tour, and Howli’s coming with them for some of it!    


“That plate says Michigan or Minnesota?” Alyssa says, looking out the window. All three of them are squished into the backseat of the van, literally pressed thigh to thigh. Dan doesn’t mind; he got the middle seat between two tiny ladies; he gets leg room for days. (At least, it felt that way at the beginning of the trip.)    
  
“Uh, Michigan.” Dan looks over. “Sorry.”    
  
“Damn. That would’ve been what, twenty states?”    
  
“Twenty-one,” Favs chirps from the seat in front of him. 

The road travels on and on and on, but it won’t be much longer until they get to where they’re going. Dan settles back and closes his eyes.    
  
About half an hour later, Howli, on his right, takes his hand. He lets her turn it palm up. She starts to trace down his fingers, running one of her tiny digits down his index, then his middle finger, then over his wedding ring, and so on. It’s intimate; Dan likes it.   
  
And then something else happens.    
  
Alyssa, half asleep next to him, shifts, and puts one of her legs over his leg, in his lap.    
  
“Uh…” He looks at her, bemused. “Can I help you?”    
  
“Sorry.” Napping Alyssa doesn’t look all that sorry. “Can I stretch out a little?”    
  
Dan doesn’t mind. Not at all. Because, well… It’s Alyssa, and her gorgeous legs. No, no he doesn’t fucking mind.    
  
She’s warm. He can feel how warm she is even through his jeans.    
  
Howli continues to idly touch him on his right. “You’re hairy,” she comments, running her fingertips over his forearm, playing with the hair there.    
  
“Mmm.” Alyssa hums, observing. “Masculine.” She moves one sandal-clad foot over and nudges Dan’s ankle.   
  
Fuck. Okay. She doesn’t need to, like, do that - she knows that feels nice, right? Compliments and touches. That usually does things to Dan. Not always safe-for-work things.    
  
“Dan  _ is  _ masculine.” Howli reaches up and scratches the back of his neck gently. “He’s a big teddy bear, though.”    
  
“That’s true.” One of Alyssa’s sandals falls off; her toes are painted ruby red. “That’s what you want, though, isn’t it? Someone big and strong, but still gentle.”    
  
“Mm-hm.” Howli rubs her thumb against the shell of his ear. “No point in being so strong if you can’t control it.”    
  
Alyssa shifts; she leans towards him in her efforts to get comfortable, and they’re very, very close.    
  
“I, uh, I gotta be in control, around you two.” Dan says. He has no idea what he’s saying. His voice comes out gravelly and low.    
  
“Yeah?” Howli says. She’s still scratching at his hair with manicured nails. “Why, Dan?”    
  
“Because…” Dan steals a look at Alyssa’s lips. Howli’s nails are sharp and bordering on the sweetest kind of pain. “You’re soft.”    
  
“Oh?” Alyssa replies. Her eyes are wide and shining with… god, Dan doesn’t know what, but it’s hot as hell, that sort of energy. 

“Yeah, you’re both really soft, and sweet…”    
  
“Hey!” Lovett calls from the front passenger seat. “I see a lot of limbs back there! There better be no funny business!”  
  
The tension is broken. Dan should be glad, too; he’s halfway to an erection in the middle of this van. On a work trip. With his co-workers.   
  
“No funny business, Lovett,” Dan calls back, “but we do need a bathroom break and a moment to stretch our legs, I think. Alyssa’s turned into a pretzel.” 

They pull into the next exit; Dan almost jogs to the rest stop and splashes cold water on his face as soon as he gets to the bathroom.    
  
When he gets out, Howli gives him a look of concern.    
  
“Everything alright?” She asks. She hands him a La Croix and a bag of cheez-its. 

“You two didn’t - plan that shit?” Dan asks. Fuck, he hasn’t felt like that since college. That horny, confused, fluttery, head-spinning  _ wtf _ feeling, it's been a long time.

“Plan what?”    
  
“Never mind.” Dan takes a deep breath.  _ Calm down.  _ “Just. Alyssa.”    
  
Howli understands immediately. She leans up on her tiptoes and gives him a soft little kiss.    
  
“We can talk about it later, at the hotel.”    
  
Dan gives her a wide-eyed look. “We can do a lot more than talk.”    
  
She smirks at him. “Oh, boy, are you gonna be okay for the next hour?” 

“Shut up.”    


When they get back to the van, Alyssa has a big smile on her face. “Alaska, Dan. A plate from fucking  _ Alaska.  _ The last frontier _.”  _

She’s too fucking cute. Howli seems to think so, too, the way she’s making eyes at him from behind Alyssa’s back.    
  
Does this still count as taking it well? 

Dan ponders the question while watching the countryside roll by out the window; the words swirl around in his head until he falls asleep. 

\---

It’s the last day of the tour, and Howli, Alyssa, and Dan are trying to see as much of New York as possible.    
  
It’s not exactly going well - they got lost on the subway, it’s pretty fucking humid, and Howli’s phone refuses to connect to wifi - but when it’s the three of them, it doesn’t matter.    
  
Personally, Dan is having a great time. He loves New York, and who better to see it with than his two favorite people?    
  
They stop inside the Strand Bookstore and walk around, lazy and full after a meal of pork buns and bubble tea. 

“We have seen precisely zero celebrities,” Howli points out. “No, Jon and Tommy don’t count.”    
  
“How many celebrities did you expect to see?” Dan asks. 

“More than I see at home.”    
  
“You don’t see any at home.”    
  
“Exactly.” Howli picks up a book. “‘Lyssa, we should rope Dan into that thing we did last year.” They had read the same book at the same time, so they could compare notes. 

“Ooh, it’ll be like a book club.” Alyssa looks excited at the idea.    
  
“Pick a good book.” Dan looks over at the nonfiction section, probably seeing if they have his paperback. 

“No, I think we’ll pick a bad one,” Howli replies smoothly. She wanders over to the LGBT section and tilts her head to look at the spines.    
  
It’s weird to think that she’s one of that community. Howli has always kind of known she’s liked girls, but it’s been in more of an abstract sort of way; crushes on singers and actresses. She’s only ever really dated men, except for a few short trysts in college. And up until recently, being married to Dan has meant she hasn’t thought seriously about anyone, man or woman, in years.    
  
The energy she feels around Alyssa has reminded her that she’s not like the rest of the world, in a sense. She likes women. She likes men. And she can like both at the same time. It’s weird to think about. But Howli doesn’t feel too bad about it. It’s kind of nice; she knows she’s not alone. 

Her finger stops over the spine of  _ The Polyamory Handbook.  _

Well. That’s not going to happen anytime soon.    
  
“Thinking of getting Dan a girlfriend?” Alyssa jokes behind her. Howli just about jumps three feet in the air.    
  
“Yes! I mean. No. Maybe?” Howli catches the look on Alyssa’s face and wonders if she’s thinking about the time they tried to seduce her. “I mean… Dan’s pretty picky.” She tries to play it off as a joke, suddenly self-conscious.

Does Alyssa think they’re swingers or something? It’s not like that. Howli doesn’t want just anybody. She doesn’t want a woman in their bed for a night. She wants someone who would be a wife, just like Dan is her husband. And they couldn’t just be in love with her, or with Dan. It would have to be all three of them, together.    
  
The heartbreak of wanting Alyssa has settled over time into a sort of dull ache, but it hasn’t really gone away. Part of Howli wonders if maybe she imagined the whole thing. Maybe that little incident was just her brain’s way of telling her that she still loves women and that she still loves more than one person at once. That there's room for more.

“Of course Dan’s picky,” Alyssa says, “he got you. Everyone else is subpar after that.”    
  
Howli feels a blush come across her cheeks. “Not to mention he got you first. His track record is pretty fantastic.”    
  
Fuck. There she goes again. Alyssa’s smile disappears and Howli feels her face heat up. She honestly didn’t mean it in any wrong way; she just meant that Alyssa is also great. But it came out like Dan holds Howli and Alyssa on the same level; like he’s married to both of them.    
  
Howli, panicking a little, searches her heart for jealousy once again. But it doesn’t come.    


It’s a strange feeling, wanting Alyssa. On one hand she herself is being overtly generous, offering her own husband to another woman. (Or  _ trying  _ to, she reminds herself ruefully.) But Dan’s heart is enormous, just like her own; it’s natural to want to share his love for her with someone amazing and perfect, like Alyssa. It doesn’t feel bad or wrong, to imagine Dan with another woman, provided the woman loves Howli, too. It just feels like… more love. 

On the other hand, Howli feels like the most selfish woman alive. Possessive and selfish and insistent. Alyssa is  _ theirs _ , the little devil on her shoulder says. She’s theirs and she should be in their bed and their kitchen and their hearts. She should be covered in kisses and given a little meal-prep lunch just like Dan gets on her way to work in the morning. 

Alyssa seems to have noticed Howli’s embarrassment. “Look!” she points up at a high shelf. “Is that the sequel to the one we read last year?”    
  
“Might be.” Howli is grateful for the change in subject. “Similar looking dust jacket.”    
  
Alyssa steps up on one of the rolling ladders leaning against the shelf. Dan comes over and he and Howli watch as she retrieves the paperback. She’s wearing a cute little sundress, one that shows off more skin than Howli’s used to seeing from her; but hey, it’s fucking hot out. Howli certainly isn’t complaining; there’s something terribly sexy about seeing the hem of her skirt shift with her legs, the long line of her muscles moving down to her calves, her bright green ankle socks peeking out of her sneakers.    
  
Dan leans over and murmurs in Howli’s ear. “Staring again?” He teases, his voice soft.    
  
Howli doesn’t smile when she looks at him. Sometimes it’s fun to tease each other about how much they want Alyssa. But standing next to a section of books all about being queer and out and proud, it feels a little too real.    
  
Alyssa’s foot slips. With a squeak, she falls over backwards, holding the copy of the book - directly into Dan’s arms, who is just barely able to catch her with lightning fast instincts.    
  
“Hey there.” Dan smiles at her. “Nice of you to drop in.”    
  
Alyssa automatically wraps her arms around his neck. “I - oh, wow.”    
  
Howli takes a step back and gets a good look at them. They look… perfect, just like that, with Dan holding her like a bride, the two of them about to step across some imaginary threshold.    
  
“Let me - let me take a picture of you two, like that,” Howli says. “You just look so damn cute.”    
  
Alyssa giggles and wraps her arms tighter around Dan, who easily holds her up.    
  
Howli takes out her phone and quickly snaps a picture. Alyssa murmurs something to Dan, and their eyes meet.    
  
It’s perfect. It’s exactly how it should be.    
  
Dan lets Alyssa down, and they awkwardly untangle themselves from each other, chuckling nervously. 

“I got the book,” Alyssa says.    
  
Howli smiles. She and Alyssa exit the store looking for the next place to get something cool to drink, chit-chatting about the author of their book and what they should do before it’s time to go do the pod. 

Dan exits a few minutes later, holding a little bag. Howli can’t see completely through the plastic, but she thinks she recognizes the striped cover of  _ The Polyamory Handbook.  _

\---

On the van ride back, Dan insists on Howli being in the middle. 

Howli doesn’t mind. She and Alyssa share a pair of headphones and listen to a Florence + the Machine album, and Howli watches the night sky turn from pink to purple to midnight blue. 

“I like being on tour with you. You should become a podcaster,” Alyssa whispers. She looks sleepy, drooped against the seat. An hour ago she joked about it being past her bedtime. 

“Yeah? What would I podcast about?”    
  
“You worked in the White House. Or you could podcast about… Howli things. Good food and good conversation. Or communications when starting a new business. Or being organized! Or… just being cool.”    
  
“Cool?” Howli raises an eyebrow, bemused.    
  
“Yeah. You’re cool.” Alyssa beams. “That’s the perfect word to describe you.”    
  
Howli soaks in the compliment like a sponge.    
  
Tommy looks back at both of them. “Speaking of cool,” he says in a voice that means  _ I totally wasn’t eavesdropping,  _ “do we want to stop at starbucks before we fully head out?”    
  
Everyone makes noises of assent.    
  
Ten minutes later Howli is sipping on her mocha while Alyssa is playing with the ice in the cup formerly filled with lemonade. “Lovett!” Alyssa calls forward. “Close the windows, it’s hot!”    
  
“The A/C barely works on this thing, you’ll regret saying that!” Lovett scoffs, but he obediently closes the windows.

Alyssa opens the lid of her cup and takes out a piece of ice. Idly, she begins to suck on it, staring out the window.    
  
Howli stares, watching a drop of water make its languorous way down the back of Alyssa’s hand and down her arm.    
  
Fuck. She turns towards Dan to see if he’s noticed.    
  
Dan has definitely noticed. When Alyssa turns, she sees two pairs of eyes glued to her.    
  
“You want some?” She holds out the cup.    
  
Howli begins to decline, but Dan pipes up, “yeah, I’ll take some.”    
  
The cup is settled between Howli’s thighs after some maneuvering, and now there’s an ice cube in Dan’s hand.    
  
Howli watches with wide eyes as Dan turns her arm over so it’s facing palm up. Slowly, he moves one corner of the ice cube down her arm, drawing a thin line of water from her soft inner elbow right to her palm.    
  
Howli shivers and looks at him wonderingly. “Why -”    
  
“Because I want to.” Dan responds. His voice is smooth and low. He’s giving her that  _ look,  _ the look that says  _ I’d make love to you if there weren’t other people around right now.  _ “This okay?”    
  
Howli nods. She turns to her left, and Alyssa is just blinking sleepily at her, still running an ice cube over her lips.    
  
“S’nice.” She nods at what Dan’s doing.    
  
Howli hadn’t considered that Alyssa might be watching. She swallows and looks back at Dan pleadingly. Dan just continues his ministrations, idly drawing designs in drops of water on her skin. It’s a strange contrast between hot and cold and combined with Alyssa’s eyes on her Howli can feel herself getting more than a little turned on. She gulps; are her nipples, rapidly hardening, showing in this t-shirt?

The joke begs to be made:  _ The ice cube isn’t the only thing that’s wet.  _ She’ll have to tell it to Dan later.   
  
Ugh. Sometimes it feels like she’s just too easy, for Dan. He could do whatever he wants to her.    
  
She would probably be the same way for Alyssa, if it ever got to that point. 

  
“Alright.” Lovett calls. “Everybody out, before I trap you all in here by parking terribly.”    
  
They all file out, stretching their legs and looking up at the hotel. Howli takes Dan’s hand and squeezes it.    
  
“Howl?” Alyssa says. Howli turns to look at her.    
  
“Yeah?”    
  
“I had a really good day today.” Alyssa leans up on her tiptoes and presses a soft, cool kiss to Howli’s cheek. Her lips are still cold, and it leaves a damp spot on Howli’s skin.    
  
Howli could cry, she’s so happy.    
  
“I did, too, honey," the endearment slipping out without conscious thought. Alyssa just makes her feel warm and soft all over. "I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”    
  
“Okay.”    
  
They make their separate ways.    
  
As soon as Howli and Dan get back to their hotel room, Howli pushes Dan back onto the bed and starts unbuttoning his shirt.    
  
“Someone’s excited,” Dan remarks.    
  
“Ice cubes? Really?” Howli raises her eyebrows at him and presses a kiss to his collarbone. “And she was right there, Dan.”    
  
“I  _ don’t  _ think that took away from it for you,” Dan points out. His expression softens. “Howli, if you want to talk about it -”    
  
“We can talk about it later,” Howli cuts him off. “Right now, Dan? I want you to fuck me.”    
  
Dan doesn’t hesitate. “I can do that.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The only celebrity I've seen in New York is when I saw Bobby Flay outside of an Aquarium Store in Manhattan. We stared at each other for a moment before his security guard told me to cross the street.


	3. The Dan

It’s the dog days of summer, and Alyssa Mastromonaco is sick.    
  
Luckily, Howli can come to the rescue. 

“What do you think you have?” She coos into her phone, pulling her hair up into a messy bun. It’s Saturday, and she was planning on sunbathing in Alyssa’s backyard with her best friend next to her, but it seems plans have changed.    
  
“A disease,” Alyssa croaks, “an illness.”    
  
Howli chuckles. “I mean, what are your symptoms?”    
  


“I’m just tired, and achey all over, and my nose is a little stuffed up, and… I’m sick.” Howli can’t see it, but she can just imagine Alyssa’s little pout.    
  
“Do you have, like, an emergency kit?”    
  
“An emergency kit?”    
  
“Dayquil and soup and tea and stuff.” Howli looks through the kitchen cabinet to see if they still have their own emergency kit still stocked. She can already hear Alyssa’s response before she says it.    
  
“I had that stuff, but I ran out the last time I got sick, and I guess I never got around to getting more.” Alyssa sighs and there’s a rustling sound in the receiver, like she’s moving under the covers. “I guess I gotta go out and get all that. Or get it delivered. So much for being an independent woman. I wish I had a husband right now.”    
  
“No, no!” Howli will not stand for this. “You’re still very independent - but you’re sick. I’ll be right over with soup and medicine.”    
  
“Oh, no, Howli, that’s not why I called, you don’t have to -”    
  
“Do you want to be alone and sick, or do you want to have soup and medicine and company?” Howli asks. She even puts one hand on her hip, even though Alyssa can’t see it.    
  
There’s a pause. “I guess I am alone, huh.” Alyssa says. Her voice is quiet and flat, defeated.    
  
Howli frowns.  _ Poor baby :(.  _ “No, you’re not, I’m going to be right over. Get showered and dressed and crawl back into bed.” And with that she hangs up the phone.    
  
Alyssa is, indeed, showered and dressed and in bed by the time that Howli lets herself in using the little key under the mat. She finds Alyssa’s biggest bowls and gets the two of them a little lunch started, ignoring the cats mewling underfoot in the kitchen. Alyssa pads out soon after she gets going, a duvet wrapped around her shoulders. 

“No grilled cheese for you, sorry.” Howli says apologetically, pouring Alyssa a generous helping of broth. “Dayquil. Take it.”    
  
“You’re a lifesaver, Howli.”    
  
“I wouldn’t go that far.” Howli shrugs. “I just wanted to salvage my Saturday.” She winks at her. “Eat.”    
  
It’s nice to mother someone, sometimes. It makes Howli feel capable. There’s something nourishing about taking care of your friends.    
  
Alyssa eats her soup and then they sit in front of the television and watch Jake Tapper interview some idiot who thinks that the Trump administration isn’t a dumpster fire.    
  
“I think I know where I got sick from,” Alyssa says.    
  
Howli looks up from the little doodle she was doing on her iPad of one of Alyssa’s cats. “Yeah?”    
  
“I had a one night stand with this girl a while ago. I must’ve gotten it from her. I knew her apartment seemed weird. Must’ve been the germs.”    
  
Howli stiffens. She’s known that Alyssa dates girls, but they haven’t really talked about it before now. And they certainly haven’t talked about Alyssa’s love life. Howli’s been careful not to bring it up since The Plan sputtered out.    
  
“Well, was it a good one night stand, anyway? Worth the eventual germ fallout?”    
  
“Yeah, it was okay.” Alyssa snuggles closer into the blankets. “But… she wouldn’t bring me soup if I asked, you know? She wasn’t - isn’t - a girlfriend.”    
  
Howli knows that. She doesn’t really know why Alyssa said it that way. “We gotta get you a husband or wife, if that’s what you’re looking for.”    
  
Alyssa mumbles something but Howli can’t hear it under the covers. When she cranes her neck to look over, Alyssa is asleep, her head on the cushions.    
  
Howli decides to let her sleep. When she wakes up an hour later, it’s just for a moment, and she seems pretty out of it.    
  
“Howli?” She says. Her face is flushed and there’s a mark from the pillow on her cheek. “Howl?”    
  
“I’m right here, babe.” Howli frowns. “You look like you have a fever. Do you want some more medicine?”    
  
“Mm-hm.” Alyssa nods. Howli gets up and brings over the Dayquil and the little measuring cup.    
  
Maybe not everyone would do this for their friends. But Howli loves Alyssa, and also she didn’t have anything else to do this afternoon, anyway. It’s also nice to pamper her a little. If Howli enjoys it more fully than she might with another friend, well, that's neither here nor there.   


Alyssa takes her medicine, and Howli looks over at her feverish, sleepy face. Even with the stuffy nose and the flush from sickness, she’s still so fucking cute.

She thinks of how her mother used to kiss her forehead to take her temperature. 

In lieu of doing that, Howli reaches over and puts the back of her hand on Alyssa’s forehead.    
  
“Cool as a cucumber,” she smiles. “You’ll be out of the woods soon, honey.”    
  
Alyssa blinks at her. “I love you, Howli-Jean,” she mumbles, and flops back down on the couch. A few minutes later she’s snoring softly.    
  
Howli goes back to her cat doodle.    
  
When she gets home that evening, Dan is there, sitting in front of the television and working on his laptop.  _ Jaws  _ is playing on the screen, the light illuminating each of the bristly hairs on his head. As she hugs his neck from behind and kisses his cheek, Howli is struck, not for the first time, by the impulse to say  _ we should get a dog.  _

Dan looks up from his laptop and kisses her back. “How was your day? I heard you played nursemaid.” He pats the couch. “Pasta’s on the counter, by the way.”    
  
Howli smiles and sets her bag down. “Alyssa said she loved me.” She pauses. “It wasn’t… she was sick, and she was just thanking me, but still.”    
  
Dan lifts a concerned eyebrow. “Babe, don’t get ahead of yourself.”    
  
“I’m not. I’m just letting you know.”    
  
The wild spirit that prompted her to fall for Alyssa in the first place has quieted now. The magic she felt when she was with her, the fireflies in a jar - it’s still present, but it’s settled, still. The image that comes to mind is more like a seed in a garden, planted right next to her love for Dan. It’ll be there, getting water and sunshine, until its time to bloom.    
  
Howli doesn’t know if that’ll ever happen. Maybe it already has.    
  
“I’m glad you had a good day,” Dan says. “I also love you, for the record,” he jokes.    
  
Howli beams. “I know.” She means it.

\---

Dan is having a no good very bad horrible shitty day, just like the children’s book. Okay, maybe the children’s book didn’t exactly go that way, but his point is that his day is not going well. Not at all. 

His boss did not seem impressed with his progress on the Chicago project, and in that same meeting scheduled a presentation that would conflict with the pod, so no pod next Thursday. Then he accidentally dropped his tupperware while taking it out of the microwave, and his chicken cutlet fell on the floor. Finally, his pen broke and spilled ink on his notebook.    
  
A bad day. But, at the very least, he’s going home, to his wife, and his bed, and he can rest. 

He gets a text on his way to the car that puts those plans on hold.

_ Had a girls’ day with Alyssa. Come hang with us! _

Dan had forgotten that Howli gets out early on Fridays in the summer. Lucky. He obediently reroutes his journey in his head and gets in the car.    
  
When he gets to Alyssa’s house and Howli answers the door, he’s not surprised.

He  _ is,  _ however, surprised by the sight of her in frilly blush-pink lingerie. 

“Whoa, hey there.” He says stupidly, a little dazed. 

“Come in, come in!” She practically tugs him forward by the hand. “I don’t want anyone else to see me!” She’s giggling.    
  
Dan refrains from mentioning that  _ she’s  _ the one who chose to answer the door like that. “Uh… What’s up?” He asks. It seems that his White House brain has checked out and his lizard brain has decided to take up residence.    
  
“We went on a shopping spree.” Howli reaches into the fridge and hands Dan a beer. “And by that I mean we bought one set of clothes each and then went to Starbucks.” 

“What’s the occasion?” Dan asks, taking his beer and wondering how the fuck his life is one where a beautiful redhead in pink lingerie is handing him alcohol after an awful day at work.    
  
“People are mean on the internet, Dan!” Alyssa says; Dan turns around, and is promptly struck dumb by what he sees. Alyssa’s leaning against the doorway between her room and the kitchen, and she’s wearing lacy black lingerie. 

Howli’s underwear is beautiful, but in a playful, sweet sort of way. Alyssa’s clothing is not playful - it’s meant to seduce. On top of the fact that it’s on Alyssa, a woman whom Dan has never seen naked before, her lingerie is… well, it’s black, and it’s lace, and it’s got stockings and…  _ yeah _ . She looks incredible in it, all mouthwatering curves and a few previously-hidden freckles, but Dan could’ve guessed that already. It’s the fact that he’s actually seeing it that’s stopping his breath.    
  
Dan is a speechwriter, but not many words are coming to mind at the moment. Alyssa puts her hands on her hips and poses a little. There are little roses embroidered on her stockings. There’s a bow where the cups of her bra meet. Dan is really in over his head, here.    
  
“Are we… are we showing off to people on the internet?” Dan asks, still sounding like a total idiot. He really hopes he’s not getting hard. He’s wearing skinny jeans and he’s pretty sure if he got hard that his dick would be pretty visible in them. Should he be looking away? She wants him to look, right? He's starting to sweat.

“Fuck no!” Alyssa turns around and Dan is now cursed with the knowledge that her panties are just the slightest bit see-through. “Just you two.” Dan coughs unconvincingly and shifts himself discreetly.  
  
She goes into the bathroom and Dan is able to breathe again. He turns to Howli, confused and aroused (a combination he’s been feeling a lot, lately). 

“Assholes on the internet said some mean shit.” Howli explains.    
  
“What else is new?” Dan replies. He’s seen some of the garbage in his own twitter mentions. He can’t imagine what’s in Alyssa’s.    


“So we decided to go feel beautiful.” Howli declares. “Did we succeed, ‘Lyssa?” She calls.    
  
Alyssa walks back out, wearing a set of pajamas and carrying a sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants. “Absolutely.” She tosses them to Howli, who walks back into the bathroom herself to get changed. “We’re hot stuff.”    
  
“You are,” Dan breathes. “Not that - not that my opinion matters, here.”    
  
Alyssa pretends to consider if his opinion has merit. “Dan, all the men on earth are trash and can leave, but you can stay.”    
  
Dan grins. “What about Jon and Tommy? Or Lovett? Or Obama?” 

Alyssa bites her lip. “Okay, I guess they can stay too. But no one else!”    
  
Howli comes back out, wearing the soft clothes that Alyssa lent her. It’s unexpectedly hot and Dan’s dick twitches in his jeans. 

He’d like to see that more often. He’d like both of them in his house, in his home, wearing pajamas or lingerie or whatever they’d like. 

“Are we hanging out here, ladies?” Dan sits at the counter and smiles at them, watches Alyssa fiddle with her phone and put some music on. “I can order a pizza, if we’re hungry.” 

“Ooh, good idea! I’ll have them deliver.” Howli takes out her phone.

“No, I’ll go pick it up.” Dan says. It’ll give him a few minutes to cool off, too.    


“Oh, if you’re going to go pick it up…” Alyssa comes up to him, super close, “could you get a change of clothes for you and Howli, and you could - could -”    
  
“Could have a sleepover?” Howli says excitedly. Her hair is up in a high ponytail; she reminds Dan a little of a protagonist in an 80s movie, the kind he used to have a crush on when he was younger. 

Dan thinks of how tired he is. Part of him wants to go to sleep in his own bed, at home. But that part is very small.   
  
“Okay.” He smiles. “Order the food and I’ll go get a change of clothes.” 

When he returns twenty minutes later with clothes for him and Howli as well as a pizza in his other hand, Alyssa and Howli are snuggled up on the couch, curled up against each other. They look really cute, and Dan’s heart is soft. His dick isn’t, though, considering he can see Alyssa’s nipples through her t-shirt and he knows damn well that Howli isn’t wearing panties.   
  
Whatever. He’s a pervert.    
  
They sit together on the couch and watch some bad SyFy channel movie and cuddle, Dan in the middle. Dan has his arms around both of them and they’re both so soft and so beautiful; Dan wouldn’t want to be anywhere else in the world.    
  
He takes a bite of his pizza and tries to cement this moment in his mind. A cool night, the breeze drifting in from the open window; the light reflecting off of Alyssa’s glasses from the television. Howli’s hand in his.    
  
His girls looked so fucking hot in their lace and frills.    
  
_ Don’t call them your girls. If anything, only one of them is yours.  _

He tries to make himself feel bad for it, but he can’t. So he just grabs another piece of pizza and lies back, and for a brief moment, pretends that it could always be like this.

Maybe today wasn’t so bad after all.

\---

“This would be better with weed in it,” Alyssa declares, staring down at the pie crust. Howli raises an eyebrow from where she’s cutting strips for the lattice.

“You think everything would be better with weed in it, you little stoner.” Howli comments with a smirk.    
  
Alyssa sticks her tongue out at her and eats a blueberry from the pile of “appetizer berries” Dan had left out for her. 

“If you had brought cannabis butter, we could’ve put it in there.” Dan remarks. He’s stirring the sugar and lemon into the blueberries. 

“Yeah, but I’ve seen what you get like when you’re high.” Alyssa grins. “And I’d rather you didn’t just fall asleep on the couch.”    
  
“That’s true.” Dan shrugs.    
  
“What are you like when you’re high, Howl?” Alyssa asks.   
  
Howli glances over at Dan.

_ C’mere, Dan, and let me suck your cock… _

“Oh, pretty boring. I mostly just stare at the ceiling.”    
  
Alyssa shrugs and goes over to watch Howli prepare the rest of the crust.   
  
“I’ve been thinking,” Alyssa says.    
  
“Never a good thing to do,” Howli replies. 

“I don’t think I’m going to date anyone anymore.”    
  
Dan pauses his stirring and adding of cinnamon. “Oh?”    
  
“After many, many one night stands and almost as many relationships, I’ve concluded that relationships in general just aren’t for me.” Alyssa’s avoiding their eyes, looking over at the recipe on Howli’s phone.    
  
Howli and Dan share a look. “Are you sure you just haven’t been in a dry spell for a while, hon?” Howli asks.    
  
“I mean, I have, but. There’s a reason for that, right? Maybe romance just isn’t for me.”    
  
Dan’s eyes go wide. Howli can practically hear the Kill Bill sirens going off in his head.    
  
“I - okay, unless you’re like, coming out as asexual, or something, I respectfully disagree with the premise.” 

Alyssa raises an eyebrow and motions for him to pass her the bowl so she can scoop the blueberries into the pie crust. “No, it’s not that. I’d  _ like  _ a relationship, but nothing ever seems to work out. And I fall in love so easily and… I dunno. It just doesn’t seem like it’s my thing.”    
  
“But it  _ should  _ be your thing,” Dan argues. “You - Jesus, ‘Lyssa, you’re incredible. You're loyal, and smart, and so much fun to be around. You’re funny, and capable, and you don’t take anyone’s shit. You deserve love, and romance, and all of that. You deserve flowers, and chocolates, and someone to cook for you, and, and -” He’s starting to sound stressed.    
  
“And orgasms!” Howli adds, because she’s thought about it, and Alyssa doesn’t get enough orgasms.    
  
“That too, and - you deserve all of that, Alyssa, and I’m one hundred percent sure that someone’s out there waiting to give it to you.” Dan finishes his monologue with an emphatic fist on the counter.    
  
Alyssa doesn’t seem convinced. “Do you know this person, Dan?”    
  
“... No.” Dan isn’t going to lie to her, Howli knows that. And she knows that as much as he wants to, he can’t just sweep her up and kiss her. Dan doesn’t come alone. They’re a pair. And Alyssa doesn’t want a pair. 

But she does want romance.    
  
“We’ll get you flowers.” Howli declares.    
  
“And chocolates.” Dan adds. “And we’re already cooking for you.”    
  
“No orgasms?” Alyssa jokes.    
  
The room is silent for precisely half a second. Then the oven dings to signal that it’s preheated.    
  
“Uh - let’s get the pie together.” Howli says. They all gather round to watch her construct it and put it in the oven.    
  
Precisely fifty minutes later, Howli puts her oven mitts on and takes out a beautiful bubbling blueberry pie. They all huddle close and admire it.    
  
“We really are something special when we’re together, huh?” Alyssa says.    
  
“Yeah,” Dan agrees. “We’re something special.”    
  
Howli hides her smile and goes over to look for spoons and ice cream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again many many thanks to @fizzy for beta-ing.


	4. Yes We (Still) Can

It’s a hot night at the tail end of July, and Howli Jean Ledbetter is supposed to be helping Alyssa Mastromonaco get laid. No, not by her personally, unfortunately, but she’s still supposed to be assisting somehow. Apparently Politicon is a good place to get laid. Alyssa swears by it. Howli pledged to help her hit on attractive fellow political podcasters (of which there are many). Being the wingman for her friend who she's in love with will be a sacrifice, but Howli can handle it.  
  
Unfortunately, she’s lost.   
  
Politicon is huge this year. Howli wanted to go because she wanted to see Eric Swalwell (shut up, he’s her political crush, he's progressive, he’s cute, don’t judge her) but most of her time has been spent wandering around panels trying to find someplace to sit.   
  
Apparently Alyssa’s at some sort of pop-up beer garden; Howli’s been trying to find her for the last seven minutes, which is way too long to be looking for a beer garden.   
  
Her phone buzzes. She glances down at it.   
  
It’s the group text between her, Alyssa, and Dan: _Please come quickly; icky guy won’t leave me alone!!!_

Yikes. Howli switches apps and calls Dan.   
  
“Hey, babe.” Dan’s voice comes through, weirdly reverbing the hum of the crowd she herself can hear all around her.   
  
“You got Alyssa’s text, right?”   
  
“Yeah, I’m looking for the booth - do you see me? I’m on the balcony.”   
  
Howli looks around the tall balcony of the convention center, first to the right, then to the left - there!   
  
“Hi honey!” She says, waving. She hears him laugh through the phone, sees his figure so many feet above her.   
  
“I can see where Alyssa is - I think she’s around aisle four, near the Newseum booth.”   
  
“Okay. I’ll meet you there - we'll rescue her from the creeper!”   
  
Howli rushes over to the booth and sees Alyssa standing at a table, a tight smile on her face as some guy talks at her. Howli can’t see his face, but she’s sure he’s entitled and smarmy.   
  
She steps forward to intervene - maybe the ‘ol _hey I’m your sister and I’m very loud and obnoxious_ routine - when from behind Alyssa, Dan steps forward.   
  
“Oh, hey, honey.” Dan leans down and plants a big kiss on Alyssa’s cheek. Her eyes go wide as he wraps his arm around her waist. “Who’s your friend?”   
  
Howli sneaks up behind Smarmy so she can hear him.   
  
“You… must be her boyfriend,” the guy says flatly.   
  
“Fiance, actually.” Dan smiles and it’s like a shark showing its teeth. It’s pretty fucking sexy. “And you are?”   
  
“I’m… just leaving,” the guy says while pivoting. He takes his pretentious stout and trudges away, past Howli.   
  
Howli grins and walks up to them. “Why, hello, Mr. and Mrs. Pfeiffer.”   
  
“Not yet,” Alyssa plays along, “the wedding’s in June.”   
  
Oh, Alyssa and Dan would look gorgeous walking down the aisle. Howli would just have to figure out how to squeeze between them. But then again, most of her daydreams about the two of them involve squeezing between them. “I didn’t get an RSVP,” she frowns dramatically.   
  
“We’ll invite you on our honeymoon.” Dan cuts in.   
  
They both stare at him. It was a simple line, extending the bit, but for some reason hearing Dan say it makes it sound incredibly salacious. Howli feels her face heat up.   
  
“And where will that be?” Howli asks, to break the tension.   
  
“Mmm, maybe Hawaii?” Alyssa tilts her head. “Then again, we’d all get burned to a crisp.”   
  
“Sunscreen can be purchased.” Dan points out.   
  
“That’s true. As can big floppy hats.” Howli adds.   
  
“Ooh, I’ve been needing a big floppy hat.” Alyssa says. She looks up at Dan, craning her neck fetchingly. “Honey, remind me to put that on the wedding registry.”   
  
Dan laughs. “Will do.”   
  
They stare at each other for a moment. Then Dan seems to remember that his arm is still around Alyssa’s waist and he untangles himself.   
  
“Alright.” Howli puts her hands on her hips. “I’ve been running around all day, learning about politics and trump and the constitution and impeachment and about a million other things, and I’m left with one question.”   
  
“What’s that, Howl?” Alyssa grins.   
  
“Where the fuck is Eric Swalwell?” 

\---

“I’m telling you, it is an extremely viable place to get laid, it just wasn’t working out for me this year.” Alyssa shrugs and leans back on their couch. She looks very comfortable with her glass of wine, her glasses slightly askew. Dan thinks she looks absolutely adorable.   
  
“Fish not biting?” Dan asks.   
  
“More like, I’m getting too old for this shit.” Alyssa blows a lock of hair out of her face. “I mean, how do I even hit on someone?”   
  
“Hi, I’m Alyssa Mastromonaco, I've written two books and I worked for the president.” Howli offers. “The good one.”   
  
“Will they know which one I’m referring to?” Alyssa wonders.   
  
“If they don’t then they’re not worth hitting on.” Howli declares.   
  
They all nod in agreement. Outside, in the backyard, an owl hoots. It’s late. Alyssa didn’t want to go home after Politicon and they didn’t want her to go home. Dan still feels warm and tingly from kissing her cheek earlier. He’s kissed her cheek before, of course but… whatever. No use in getting old hopes up. He’s just happy to have her around.   
  
He looks over at Howli. Her hair has fallen out of its ponytail and it’s framing her face in long waves; it looks really cute. He once again wonders how on Earth a woman like her married a guy like him (it’s basically a daily thought exercise). 

“Dan,” Alyssa asks, “How do you hit on someone?”   
  
Dan blinks at her. “I don’t really do it anymore, ‘Lyssa.”   
  
“Okay, how _did_ you hit on someone?”   
  
“Well,” Dan sits up and tries to think, “the last person I hit on was Howli, so…”   
  
“Oh, that doesn’t count.” Alyssa shakes her head. “You didn’t _hit on_ Howli. You _seduced_ her. You _wooed_ her.” Alyssa’s waving her wineglass around, but Dan knows she’s actually pretty sober. She’s just goofy.   
  
He turns to Howli. “That true?”   
  
She nods. “It’s true. I was wooed.”   
  
“Then I guess we should change the subject,” Alyssa says. “Tell me, Dan, how you did it back in the day. How did you seduce the last woman you ever seduced?”   
  
Dan pauses. It’s such a funny little thing that he can’t help but smile. It was so long ago, it feels, even if it was just earlier in the summer.   
  
“I mean… you would know, Alyssa.” He gives her a sheepish smile.   
  
Alyssa blinks. “How would I know?” She tilts her head, kind of like a puppy dog. “I wasn’t there when you and Howli -”   
  
“Dan,” Howli cuts in, “she probably put it out of her memory. Maybe it’s best if we do the same and move on? Who wants more wine?” Howli stands to go get the bottle, but Alyssa holds her hand up. 

“Put _what_ out of my memory? What are you two talking about?”   
  
Howli slowly sits back down. Her cheeks are a little red from embarrassment. Dan can’t say he doesn’t feel the same pang. It’s one thing for your seduction not to work, it’s another for it to be forgotten entirely. To have not even registered _at all_ .   
  
“When we tried to seduce you, ‘Lyssa.” He says it gently. “Remember?”   
  
Alyssa stares at him like he’s just told her he doesn’t believe in climate change. When she speaks, it’s with the confusion of someone who doesn’t understand a single iota of the preceding conversation.   
  
_“No, I don’t fucking remember you two trying to seduce me!”_

Howli winces. “Well, it was a while ago, and -”   
  
“No, no no no.” Alyssa puts her wine glass down. “Let me get this straight. You two - Dan Pfeiffer and Howli Ledbetter - tried to seduce me.”   
  
“Yes.” Dan nods. “Earlier this summer.”   
  
“ _Earlier this_ \- when the fuck was this?!”   
  
“Don’t you remember our dinner date?” Howli genuinely seems to be feeling really hurt, here. “I made cinnamon rolls.”   
  
Alyssa’s eyes go wide. “You mean - we had _dinner_ together, you guys.”   
  
“We said it was a date,” Howli mumbles. She looks really miserable and Dan wants to take her into his arms. “I even tried to kiss you.”   
  
Alyssa looks like she might pass out right there on the sofa. “Okay, uh.” She shakes her head as if to clear it. “Let’s - let’s take this one at a time. You said that night was… a _date?”_

Howli glares at her. “I told you it was, ‘Lyssa.” There’s fear in her eyes, too. Dan’s starting to realize there might have been a big, big misunderstanding here.   
  
“Show me where you said it was a date. Tell me where in the event you said that.”   
  
Howli takes out her phone and scrolls way, way up in her messages with Alyssa. She tilts her head and for a moment Dan is distracted by how her ponytail swishes.   
  
“Here.” She hands Alyssa the phone.   
  
Alyssa looks at the text. When she looks back up at Howli, it’s like she’s seen the ark of the covenant or something.   
  
“Howli,” she says slowly, “sometimes when people say, ‘it’s a date’, they just mean… the event is set. They don’t actually mean that it’s… a romantic date.”   
  
Dan, who up to this point has been unaware of how exactly Howli made it clear that their date was a date, looks over at his wife.   
  
She looks over at him, sheepishness incarnate. “Oops,” she says.   
  
For a split second Dan is back in the White House and he’s looking at an intern who has just spilled printer ink all over the president’s daily briefing. “Yeah. Oops,” he replies.   
  
(His wife is much prettier than any intern, and is the source of everything good in his life, and will thus not receive his wrath. But probably his mockery. If they get out of this mess.)   
  
They turn back to Alyssa, who is still turning things over in her head.   
  
“Okay, so… “ Alyssa stands up and starts to pace. “You and Howli decide to… invite me over, feed me dinner, make me feel really good, you -” she points to Howli, “apparently try to kiss me… for what?”   
  
Dan points out the obvious. “For you, uh, to come to bed with us.”   
  
“Oh.” Alyssa squeaks. “And this was - I don’t know, like. Like a best friends threesome sort of deal?”   
  
“No!” Howli interjects. “We thought you were in love with us!”   
  
“I mean, I _am_ in love with you, I just don’t see how that would make things easier for -” Alyssa cuts herself off and claps a hand over her mouth.   
  
Dan feels something inside him start to grow. Bigger and bigger, like a balloon inflating.   
  
Hope.   
  
“You’re… you’re in love with us?” Dan asks, trying to regulate his breathing. He stands, because this is important, and he feels like he should be standing for something this important. Howli takes a look at him and stands, too.   
  
Alyssa nods. “Both of you. It’s a, a package deal, sort of thing. I've been wishing ... well.” She swallows. “Um. So that might - that might make a casual threesome kind of awkward.”   
  
Howli smiles - it’s this big, sparkling smile that lights up the room. “I… I don’t think it will, my beautiful, sexy, vivacious, hilarious friend, because we’re in love with you, too.” 

Alyssa looks at both of them, first at Howli, then at Dan for confirmation. Dan just nods. 

There’s no coordination, or anything - one moment they’re just looking at each other, the next they’re rushing forward into a big group hug.   
  
Alyssa’s half laughing, half crying. Dan wraps his arms around both of them and kisses Howli’s forehead, squeezes Alyssa’s shoulder.   
  
“Can I date you guys?” Alyssa asks into Dan’s chest. “Can - can I do that? Can I date two people?”   
  
Howli steps back so she can look Alyssa in the eye. “You can _absolutely_ date both of us, but -” she’s going to cry, Dan can hear it in her voice, “but you gotta let us redo that first date. We’re really good at seduction, we swear.”   
  
Alyssa laughs and wipes at her eyes. “I’ll know it’s a date this time. I’ll react properly.” She blinks up at Dan and it’s like there are stars in her eyes. “God, all this time I thought I was imagining…”   
  
Dan shakes his head. “We’re real, ‘Lyssa.” He pulls her back into another hug. “We’re real, and we love you so, so fucking much.” 

\---  
  
It’s been two weeks since they’ve started dating Alyssa, and Howli couldn’t be happier.   
  
Turns out, dating Alyssa isn’t a whole lot different than being friends with Alyssa. Except now, when they go out for Chinese food and Alyssa gives Howli one of her dumplings because Howli wanted to order the chicken but also wanted to try the dumplings, Howli can just lean over and kiss her in gratitude.   
  
There’s been some kissing, and some light touching, and a couple of particularly memorable makeout sessions on the couch - one of which Howli had the tremendously good fortune of walking in on after a hard day at work, what a lovely sight to come home to - but nothing too graphic. Nothing over PG-13, provided that your PG-13 movie has threesomes in it. 

It’s not _that_ important - Alyssa has made it clear she’s not going anywhere any time soon, and sex certainly isn’t everything, but… Howli wants things. Specific things. Things that are not safe for work and probably won’t be any time soon.   
  
The last time she really wanted something, it turns out she was right to want it and everything turned out perfectly. So maybe this time is like the last. And even if it’s not, odds are she’ll still have a pretty good result anyway. It’s Dan and Alyssa. She rarely has a bad time around them. 

It’s Friday. They’ve all gotten home from work and had dinner, which Dan cooked and doled into little bowls by the time Howli got home. There were mangoes and chocolate covered almonds for dessert, and now the three of them are idly watching a Law and Order rerun on the television while scrolling through twitter on their phones. It’s incredibly domestic and cozy and Howli loves every moment of it. And yet…

She leans forward and takes the remote, presses pause on the episode. Dan and Alyssa look up.   
  
“Stabler not doing it for you, babe?” Dan asks.   
  
Howli takes a deep breath. She has learned, in the last few weeks, that she needs to be as clear as possible when asking for the things that she wants. “I think we should have sex.” She says.   
  
Both Alyssa and Dan sit up straight. Dan leans forward. “You mean, like. All three of us?”   
  
Howli nods. “Of course!”   
  
Alyssa grins. “That sounds like a great idea.” She puts her phone away. “Do you - do we want to do this here?”   
  
Howli thinks for a moment. “We should do this in the bedroom.” She wants to do this right.

They all drift towards the bedroom, Howli stopping to give both of them happy, deep kisses in thanks. It’s nice when things work out how they should. 

They all end up on the bed and there’s a beat of silence. “So,” Dan says, “how do we want to -”   
  
Alyssa starts kissing him.   
  
This? This is what Howli has wanted. She didn’t even know it but she wanted it long before this entire business with Alyssa started. Dan looks so, so fucking good kissing Alyssa. Dan’s a very good kisser; Howli knows better than anybody. He somehow knows how to make his kisses deep and intense without adding too much tongue or opening his mouth up too much. Before you know it, you’re in a whirlwind of kisses, and he’s got you right where he wants you.   
  
Howli scooches up behind Alyssa and presses kisses at the back of her neck, reaching her arms around her to hug her middle. Alyssa hums and leans back and lets Howli kiss at her neck. Then she turns and kisses her, and fuck, Alyssa is as good of a kisser as Dan, but in a different way. 

“Hey there, stranger.” Alyssa murmurs against Howli’s lips. Howli settles her hands against Alyssa’s hips, feels Dan’s eyes on her as she moves them down, over Alyssa’s thighs.   
  
“Um,” Alyssa moves and presses a few kisses against Howli’s neck, “can I - can I do something?”   
  
Howli nods encouragingly. “We can do whatever you want, baby.” 

“Uh - could I - could I get changed?” She bites her lip. “I’d like to put on the, uh, the underwear we bought that one time."   
  
Dan immediately pipes up. “That sounds like a great idea,” he agrees; Alyssa and Howli look at each other and burst into giggles. “Sorry,” Dan can’t hide his grin, “that sounded a bit too excited.”   
  
“No, no,” Alyssa shakes her head with a smile, “you’re great.”   
  
She hops up and grabs a few bundles of clothing from her drawer, the one in the dresser that’s been definitively designated as Alyssa’s. She’s not living with them yet, but Howli hopes that the drawer means she’s on her way. 

Howli knows it’s probably too soon to be thinking about all of that, but… what can she say? She’s ambitious. 

Alyssa disappears into the bathroom for a moment before poking her head out the door. “I want to make a grand entrance,” she explains.   
  
“Go ahead,” Dan says. He sounds amused and completely and utterly in love. It might be the sexiest tone of voice Howli’s ever heard on him.   
  
She’s only now realizing that he uses it with her on a regular basis, and she’s just never noticed. 

While Alyssa’s in the bathroom getting changed, Dan turns his attention towards his wife. “Hey there.” 

Howli leans close to him, moving her hand up his chest. He’s so broad. “Hey there. We did something pretty good, didn’t we?”   
  
“We’re _doing_ something pretty good,” Dan replies. “Kiss me.”   
  
Howli obeys eagerly, reaching up to cup his cheek. His arms wrap around her, and she winds up on his lap, straddling his waist. Kissing Dan will never get old. Feeling his body underneath her, warm and sure and strong, will never get old. Her Dan, familiar and strong and beloved.   
  
She gently pushes him back, tilting his head up with her thumb so she can kiss at his neck. (It’s something he enjoys a lot but will never ever ask for.)   
  
“Babe - your shirt?” He pushes his hands underneath it, feeling the bumps of her spine. She shivers.   
  
“Off.” She kisses him again, sliding her tongue against his. “Off, take it all off me, Dan.”   
  
Dan helps her pull her shirt up and off, and is about to do that thing where he kisses her neck while simultaneously taking her bra off - something she always finds impressive - when the bathroom door opens.   
  
“Am I interrupting something, folks?” Alyssa strikes a dramatic pose, leaning against the doorway.   
  
Dan lets out a low wolf whistle. Howli’s inclined to agree. Alyssa looked good in the black bra and panties before (and the stockings, can’t forget the stockings), but now she really has permission to _look,_ to admire the deep dip of cleavage at her chest, the smooth creamy pale skin of her thighs, the dark curls Howli can see through the lace of her panties. And her smile - God, her smile is so _Alyssa,_ the perfect mix of confidence and shyness.   
  
“Get over here,” Howli commands. Alyssa grins and hops back on the bed, and Howli takes the opportunity to crawl on top of her.   
  
Alyssa is soft and sweet, and Howli’s instinct is to squeeze every part of her she can find. She kisses her, and kisses her, and moves her hand over Alyssa’s breasts, groping them just because she can. Alyssa smiles into her mouth and reaches around to take Howli’s bra off.   
  
“You know…” Alyssa murmurs in Howli’s ear, nipping at her earlobe, “I heard redheads have higher sex drives.”   
  
Howli’s mouth drops open in delight and she looks over at Dan, who is watching them and lazily palming himself through his pants. “Babe, you said the same thing during our first time!”   
  
He shrugs. “Well, from my experience, it’s true.”   
  
Howli grins wickedly down at Alyssa. “I’m a wild child.”   
  
“So I’ve heard.” Alyssa pulls Howli back down and there’s more kissing, this time on her collarbones and then Alyssa’s pulling her up by her ass and her nipples are in Alyssa’s mouth.   
  
Oooh, _yes,_ that feels fucking delicious. Howli closes her eyes and allows herself to be suckled for a bit. Dan comes up and kisses her while Alyssa’s doing so. Oh, this is _heavenly._ Alyssa isn’t afraid to lick or bite or get a little rough when she needs to. Howli could revel in this - the warm weight of her breasts and Alyssa’s mouth wrapped around her nipples. 

But tonight shouldn’t be about her. Her birthday, her and Dan’s anniversary - that can be about her, if they want. Tonight should be about Alyssa.   
  
She moves away and kisses Alyssa thank you, then moves over so she and Dan are bracketing her. “See the details on her clothes, Dan?” Howli comments, leaning on her elbow. “See the little bow?”   
  
Dan reaches out and brushes it with his thumb. “Pretty,” he says. His fingertips move over, over the swell of her breast, running along the line of the wire of her bra.   
  
“And the lace on her panties?” Howli brushes her fingertips down Alyssa’s stomach, making her shiver. She runs one nail under the band of Alyssa’s panties, watching how the shadow forms on her hipbones through the lace. “That’s pretty too.”   
  
Dan moves down, presses a kiss to Alyssa’s shoulder. “She’s like a present.” His words are low and full of intent.   
  
Alyssa squirms. “Could - could we unwrap me now, please?”   
  
Dan smiles smugly and kisses her, long and deep. “Getting impatient, babe?” He teases. “Or is your pussy just too wet for us to ignore?”   
  
Alyssa sucks in a breath of air. Her voice is high and tight when she speaks. “The - the second one.” She takes a deep breath and sits up. “Someone get me naked, please.”   
  
Howli amuses Alyssa with some teasing kisses to her shoulders and neck while Dan undoes her bra. Evidently it’s more difficult than Howli’s and he fusses for a moment, evoking a giggle from Alyssa’s end.   
  
Then she’s gloriously topless and her tits are… fantastic, which Howli already suspected, but having it confirmed is indeed very, very good. Big and full and her nipples are dark pink like her blush and Howli needs to get her mouth on them pronto.   
  
“Lie back.” She pats the pillow and Alyssa obediently lies on the pillow with a cute little wiggle.   
  
Howli kisses down her neck, down to her pretty, perfect tits. Without any real ceremony, she takes a nipple into her mouth and licks at it like she remembers Dan doing.   
  
Alyssa sighs and her hand immediately flies to Howli’s hair. “Yes, Howl…” she whispers. Howli smiles and nips at her a bit. Alyssa squeaks.   
  
Dan occupies himself by making out with her for a bit, but then he shuffles down next to Howli. “Move your head,” he tells her.   
  
Howli obediently does so, maneuvering so she’s on one side of Alyssa’s legs and Dan’s on the other. Dan looks at her with a twinkle in his eye before he leans down and sucks on Alyssa’s other nipple, taking care not to bump heads with his wife. At one point, he manages to look over and grin at Howli, as if to say _can you believe we’re this lucky?_

“Oh,” Alyssa breathes. “Oh, oh _God…”_ She's got her hands in their hair and squeezes a bit.

Howli hums happily as she nibbles on Alyssa. She’s thought about this fantasy plenty of times, both giving and receiving. She’s glad Alyssa’s experiencing it.   
  
Dan reaches up and squeezes her breast, mumbling something that Howli can’t really hear (didn’t he ever learn not to talk with his mouth full?). Alyssa just nods and sighs breathily. She’s so excited that Howli can almost feel her heartbeat drumming through her skin.

After a few minutes of this, Alyssa apparently can’t handle any more and tries to wriggle a hand between her legs. Howli sits up and watches her rub herself for a moment, her husband at her breast, worshipping her. He always prefers to be rough when he can be, sucking hard. Evidently Alyssa likes it that way. Howli will keep that in mind for the future.   
  
“You want something, ‘Lyssa?” Howli asks.   
  
“Help me get my fucking - panties off.” Alyssa has to pause to breath for a second. Howli grins and pushes Dan away gently so she can move over her girlfriend once again. 

(And how good does that feel, by the way? Alyssa is her _girlfriend._ Howli has a girlfriend, and she’s the best girlfriend ever.)

Careful, gentle not to rip the lace, Howli pulls Alyssa’s panties off, watching her lift her legs. She tosses the piece of fabric to the side and spreads her legs, finally getting a good look at her pussy.   
  
Fuck, she’s hot. She’s wet, soaked; Howli can see it through her curls. Automatically, Howli leans down and kisses up her legs, moving to her thighs. She can hear Dan and Alyssa kissing above her, and Dan taking off his shirt.   
  
Howli hasn’t eaten pussy since college; even then, that was once, and it wasn’t a particularly memorable experience. But even upon first sight, Howli knows this is going to be much better. 

Slowly, she spreads Alyssa open slightly with her thumbs, admiring how soft and pretty her folds are. God, and her _clit -_ swollen and pink, like a flower bud.   
  
Howli swallows and leans in, presses a light kiss to it, experimental. She likes the taste. She likes the closeness. She likes all of it.   
  
Alyssa shivers. “You’re being a big tease here, Howli-Jean.” 

Howli hums a little. “Dan, shut her up, would you?”   
  
Dan obeys by moving to kiss her again, pushing his tongue into her mouth. Howli admires the quick sight of pink, the two of them sliding their tongues against each other, before she goes to work.   
  
Alyssa is wet. Really wet. Howli happily laps at her before moving back up to her clit, and then she licks at her there, for a bit. No, it’s probably not the most complex or sophisticated oral sex ever, but Howli thinks it’s the thought that counts. Alyssa certainly seems to like it, from the way she’s sighing into Dan’s mouth, and her hands moving to her breasts, and the constant stream of wetness from between her legs. 

Alyssa taps at Howli’s shoulder after a bit, and Howli looks up. Her girlfriend looks great. Dan’s hands look great, cupping her tits.   
  
“Uh, could - could I make a request?”   
  
Howli grins. “Absolutely.”   
  
“Could I have someone’s fingers inside me? Please?”   
  
Alyssa is so fucking cute. “Definitely.” Howli nods at Dan and Dan nods eagerly. _Slut,_ Howli thinks with fondness.   
  
She sits up and crawls over to the nightstand, where she pulls out two small bottles. She holds them up in front of Alyssa. Dan’s moved down to sit between Alyssa’s legs; he appears to be doing nothing more than admiring her pussy like it’s modern art. Howli feels like she can read his mind: "How did I get so lucky?"   
  
“This one or this one?” Howli asks. 

Alyssa blinks. “How many lubes do you have?”   
  
Howli grins. “Like, seven. You should see my vibrators.”   
  
Alyssa leans forward to glance into her nightstand but Howli slams the drawer shut. “Next time, Mastromonaco.” She winks at her.   
  
Alyssa shivers in anticipation. She points at one of the bottles. “That one.”   
  
Howli tosses it to Dan and he drizzles some of it on his fingers while Howli curls up next to her girl. “How ya doing?” She asks. Alyssa just kisses her in response.   
  
With a look of intense concentration, Dan gently slides one finger inside her, his lips parting slightly. Alyssa sighs and closes her eyes. Howli nuzzles against her cheek, squeezing her breast and pinching her nipple.   
  
“ _Yeah…”_ Alyssa murmurs. Howli thinks for a moment about how long Alyssa might have been thinking about this. She’s known Dan for longer than Howli has. She herself said she fell for Dan long before Howli was even in the picture. This, right here, is the culmination of many years of friendship and pining. The tension in the air is very, very real.   
  
Howli is so fucking wet. She shoves off her shorts and panties like they’re burning her skin. 

Dan slowly moves his finger in and out of Alyssa’s pussy, curling it slightly. After about a minute or so, he adds a second finger, and whatever he’s doing inside her seems to get better, because Alyssa starts to rock her hips back on him, pushing him to move harder against that spot.   
  
“I can - you can be rougher,” she says. Her breathing is labored. Howli moves down to suck on her tits again. She smiles as she wriggles under Alyssa’s arm. _Good job, Daniel._

“Okay.” Dan nods, but his voice sounds far away, like his focus is solely on the wet sounds Alyssa’s pussy is making. “Yeah, okay.”   
  
He moves his fingers back in, harder, faster this time, and Alyssa moans, loud, low. It’s the best sound. 

Howli can feel it when she starts to get close - can feel her twitch a little, can hear the hitch in her breath - but she taps on Howli’s shoulder once again and says, “wait, wait,” and Howli lets go of her nipple.   
  
Dan slowly removes his fingers. “Everything okay?”   
  
“Yeah, I just…” Alyssa catches her breath. “I don’t want to come like that. I want…” She looks a bit shy, which is amazing for someone looking so thoroughly debauched. “I want to come with you inside me? And…” She swallows and looks at Howli. “And you on top of me.”   
  
“Fuck, yeah.” Dan breathes. “Yeah, we can do that. Howli - uh - condoms?”   
  
Howli nods and goes over to grab them. “How do we want to do this?” She asks.   
  
Dan thinks for a moment. “Maybe, uh, I can be at the foot of the bed?” He looks over at Alyssa. “I, um, prefer to stand,” he explains. Alyssa nods in understanding and grabs a pillow. She scoots down while Howli hands Dan a condom and he unzips his pants.   
  
He pushes down his boxers - the ones with the little hearts on them, Howli loves those, thank you bargain bin - and then he’s naked in front of the both of them.   
  
“Whoa.” Alyssa says. Her eyes are glued to his dick, which is hard and has a tiny pearl of precome at the tip and it’s very, very pretty.   
  
Howli snickers. She had a similar response, the first time.   
  
Dan rolls his eyes. “God, not you too.”   
  
“It’s fucking big, Dan!” Alyssa protests. “It’s huge!”   
  
“It’s - it’s proportional to my body.” Dan puts one knee on the bed. “Look, if you don’t want to, we don’t have to do anything with my -”   
  
“Oh no, honey, you misunderstand. I want that inside me.” Alyssa looks very serious. “In fact, if you don’t fuck me with your huge cock I’ll be very disappointed.”   
  
Dan sighs and shakes his head. “I love you so much, you know that?”   
  
“I do.” Alyssa lies back, her head on the pillow. “Put it in me, Dan.”   
  
Dan lubes himself up liberally, and slides into her, slowly.   
  
Alyssa winces. Dan blinks at her. “Good?”   
  
“Uh, actually, could we try again? Just the angle.”   
  
Dan nods and pulls out of her. Howli peppers her face with kisses to distract her from any lingering pain.   
  
He squeezes his cock once, lines up, and then pushes in a second time. Alyssa sighs and then lets out a high, sharp sound of pleasure. Howli grins.   
  
“Oh, _fuck_ me. Fuck _me,_ oh my god.”   
  
Dan chuckles. “I’m - I’m gonna do that.” His voice is strained. Howli wonders how good Alyssa must feel, gripping him. Wet and warm and probably fantastic.   
  
“Howli, Howli.” Alyssa reaches for her. “C’mere, I want you on me.”   
  
“Where do you want me, babe?” Howli asks. “I mean, I can sort of straddle your chest, I guess, but -”   
  
“No, sweetie I want you to sit on my face.” Alyssa clarifies.   
  
Oh. “I can - I can do that.”   
  
This isn’t a position she and Dan do very often, not for any particular reason. But she’s reminded of how fucking hot it is when her thighs are around Alyssa’s ears and she’s settling down with her clit over Alyssa’s mouth.   
  
Dan starts to move and Howli takes a deep breath.   
  
Alyssa’s mouth feels… heavenly is probably the best word. Her lips are soft and she’s delicate and sweet and her tongue is really, really fucking nice on her clit. What helps is the noises she can hear from behind her, as Dan enjoys Alyssa’s cunt.   
  
“You look so fucking hot like that, Howl.” Dan says. His voice is rough and low, his words punctuated by his movements. “‘Lyssa, you feel - God, it’s…”   
  
He trails off, and Howli wriggles a little bit with pride that they’ve driven the wordsmith speechless.   
  
Alyssa moans when Howli wiggles on top of her, so Howli does it again, this time in a more pointed way, gently rocking her hips down onto Alyssa’s face. Alyssa’s eyes flutter shut as Howli finds a rhythm and pressure that works for her.   
  
There’s silence, for a little while. Time stops; it’s just the three of them, together, finding their pleasure in each other. The magic that Howli felt when they were dancing in the living room that one time, the gold-dipped happiness she felt when Dan caught Alyssa in his arms at the bookstore - it’s here, now, with them. Howli can’t see it, but she can feel the steady motion of Dan’s thrusts inside Alyssa, can feel how they’re deep and hard and sure. Alyssa moans around her clit; Howli looks down and winks at her. 

Alyssa squirms a bit, her hand moving from Howli’s thigh, under her thigh, presumably to rub at her clit. 

Dan apparently bats her hand away. “That’s my job,” he chuckles. 

Then she’s making more noise. Howli leans into the vibrations and grinds down just a little harder onto her.   
  
Dan speeds up; Howli can hear his breathing. There’s the sound of his skin meeting hers and then Alyssa’s eyes fly open and she comes with an honest to god squeak, her lips making an “oh!” around Howli’s clit.   
  
Howli nods in encouragement and rocks her hips down on her while it happens, knowing now that Alyssa likes it. Dan groans behind her; his thrusts slow and then eventually come to a stop.   
  
Howli pushes off of her and sees the mess she’s left on Alyssa’s face. She's radiant; Howli kisses her deeply and nibbles on her lip.   
  
“Oh, wow.” Alyssa sighs. Her eyes are glassy, her pupils blown wide. She looks appropriately well fucked. “God, that was… wow.”   
  
Dan chuckles. He’s idly stroking his cock, still hard, having taken the condom off and tossed it in the wastebasket. “Glad to be of service,” he quips. He winks at Howli.   
  
Alyssa catches her breath for a moment and then looks at Dan. “You didn’t come,” she whines.   
  
“I know. Gotta take care of this one,” he nods at Howli. “Babe, move up and get on your side?”   
  
Alyssa’s eyes widen. “Ooh, so I can face her!”   
  
“That’s the idea.” 

The two ladies move up back to the head of the bed and Howli obediently turns on her side, so they’re spooning. Dan lies down beside her and she spreads her legs, tucking her ankle behind his calf. Alyssa snuggles up in front of her, also on her side.   
  
“Hi.” Alyssa whispers.   
  
“Hi.” Howli says. Alyssa leans in and pecks her on the lips; Howli thinks wildly of trying to kiss her by the front door so many months ago.   
  
_Finally._

Dan’s leaning on his elbow so he can whisper in her ear. With his other hand, he lines up his cock and gently pushes the head of it inside her. Then he stills. “Push it in,” he says. His tone is teasing, filthy. He loves to do this. She loves when he does it; it’s both extremely frustrating and incredibly hot.  
  
Howli rolls her eyes. “Dan -”   
  
“Go on, push it in. You want my cock or not?”   
  
Howli groans and squirms, shoving herself down on his cock. Without any warning, he thrusts up inside her, as deep as he can possibly go. It throws her off guard and knocks the air out of her. She moans, loud; Dan reaches around to squeeze her breast.   
  
“There you go.” He begins to move; short, quick thrusts that hit right where she wants. Howli parts her lips in pleasure and reaches down to rub at her clit.   
  
Alyssa moves even closer, inches away from her face. She reaches over, puts her hand on Howli’s waist. It feels possessive and Howli fucking loves it. This won’t take long; she can feel herself getting close already. 

“You felt so good on top of me, Howli-Jean.” Alyssa murmurs. “Your pussy felt so fucking good in my mouth. You tasted so good.”   
  
“Oh my god,” Howli gasps out.   
  
“Dan was so big inside me, he felt so fucking good.” Alyssa kisses her, insistent, lust and need and so, so much love shining through. “I love you both so much, you’re so fucking hot -”   
  
“ _Fuck,”_ Howli bites her lip and rubs at her clit harder, faster, aiming less for finesse and more for pressure. She’s so close, she’s so fucking close -   
  
“Come for me, Howli, please, I’ve never seen you come before, you’re so beautiful, come for me and Dan, c’mon -” Alyssa leans in and kisses her, reaching up to pinch her nipple.   
  
Howli has to break away from the kiss immediately and comes with a shout, squirming on Dan’s cock and probably making a mess between her legs. She wrings out every last bit of it, until her clit’s too sensitive to rub and she feels weak from exertion. Dan thrusts into her a few more times, his breathing heavy on her neck, and then he’s coming, too, long spurts across her thigh and on the sheets. 

All three of them just lie there and breathe for a moment. 

Howli smiles at Alyssa. Alyssa smiles back. Dan kisses Howli’s shoulder. 

She glances down at the mess and smiles. It was sweet of Dan not to come inside her; she doesn’t like the rush to the bathroom afterwards. It did get on the sheets, however. No problem; they'll change them after they shower.   
  
“That was really good.” Howli says. “Really, really good.”   
  
“So good.” Dan agrees. He takes a deep breath and rolls over, reaching for the tissues and handing them out. “I will say I’m offering one more orgasm to each of you while my blood’s still running. Limited time offer.”   
  
“Next time.” Alyssa takes a tissue from him, sitting up. “Normally I can do multiples, but, uh. The last one wore me out, as did seeing - and hearing - this one.” She leans down and kisses Howli’s forehead. “You’re loud.”   
  
Dan smiles down at her. “There’s a reason she’s called Howli.”   
  
Howli rolls her eyes. “You’re just happy you have someone else to tell that joke to.”   
  
“Yes.”   
  
The three of them get cleaned up and rest for a bit, staring at the ceiling. They’ll take showers in a little while; they might have to take turns, though.   
  
_Note to self; see if we can get the bathroom remodeled so the shower is bigger._

Howli reaches over and takes both Alyssa and Dan’s hands in hers. She stares up at the ceiling and smiles.   
  
“You know, Dan didn’t think this would work, originally.” She says. Dan narrows his eyes at her from the corner of her eye, and she grins at him.   
  
“Didn’t think what would work?”   
  
“Us seducing you.” Howli explains. “He thought my plan wouldn’t work.”   
  
“Well,” Howli can hear the smile in Alyssa’s voice, “what do you think now, Dan? Do you think the plan worked?”   
  
Dan huffs out a laugh, squeezing Howli’s hand. “I think it worked brilliantly.” 

\--- 

Six months later, a cool September breeze rushes through the windows as Alyssa, Howli, and Dan are all getting ready for bed.   
  
“Guys,” Howli says, “have you ever noticed how Jon and Tommy are like… super close?”   
  
Alyssa looks up from where she’s pulling her pajama top on. “Yeah, they’re like. In love with each other, but. You know. They’re weird about it.” 

There’s a pause. Howli’s eyes go wide. She tilts her head. “Wouldn’t it be cool if we got them to see how much they like each other?”   
  
Dan walks out of the bathroom, taking his watch off and setting it on the nightstand. “I mean, I guess… how would we even do that?”   
  
He turns, and sees a sly smile grow on Howli’s face.   
  
“I think… I have a way for us to get them together,” she says simply. 

Dan glances over at Alyssa. Her eyes are wide, too; she’s hooked on Howli’s idea.   
  
_Oh, great_ , Dan thinks, _here we go again._ Still, he crawls into bed, beckons his girls into his arms, and listens to his wife’s plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, many, many thanks to fizzy for beta-ing this. Also, Howli should be in more fic, she's super fun to write.

**Author's Note:**

> The song Howli and Alyssa were dancing to is Juice by Lizzo. Three cheers to @fizzy for betaing. More to come soon.


End file.
